The Price of Transformation

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The Price of Transformation:

The 5 Stages of Personal Transformation


Personal Transformation and Change is something that dawns upon us one day or another. Personal Transformation equates to personal growth and expansion, just like a toddler transforms day by day into what one day becomes an adult. It is the cycle of nature.

Resisting change, is resisting the cycle of nature and thus blocking the flow of life, the flow of natural evolution.

But what happens when change in your life is marked by a major life threatening event or an event that is rather painful instead of a relaxed peaceful change?

End of 2015 was the beginning of a very big shift in my life, and the mark of probably one of the biggest transformations. I experienced death very closely to the extent of truly being closer to death than to life. And at the hands of the person I most trusted.

As you can imagine, the dimension of life lessons contained and derived from this experience are far beyond what I can describe in one single post but even far beyond what my intellect could assimilate and make sense of.

The way this event unfolded looked very much like a physical projection of a very important mechanism or rather metaphor of life and death - of beginning things and the end of things, through to salvation and rebirth.

1. The End

The end comes through some form of conflict through which you always want to win. Your survival instinct kicks in and you want to fight for your life or for whatever outcome you believe you should have.  In all this fighting you start getting depleted of energy and you realise that no matter how strong you are, how strong you want to be and how strong you must be, that the more power, strength and force you put in, the more you waste energy and you are still not winning the fight, no matter how hard you try. You are using energy but getting nowhere. The "weaker" you become.

The "weaker" I became, I lost not my will to fight but I had lost the physical strength to fight, for my "opponent" was way stronger than me.


2. Surrender

In this moment, once I had done everything I could possibly do, I had nothing left to do but surrender. The first part of surrender was not surrender, it was a 5 second moment of giving up and accepting that there was nothing I could do and i was just waiting for this painful earth experience to pass associated with my human body, so I could go to the other side and not feel pain anymore. For a second I started dozing off and almost blocking away all noise, aggression and pain of that moment. And then I remembered, that all these years I have lived, that I have not even truly lived and that I was waiting for the right moment and actually who was this person to even think they have the right to end my life. Then my system remembered that if there is one single thing I know for sure is that there is a Higher Power and perhaps my life long accumulation of prayers and spiritual connection and practice would pay off.

My faith was put to test. I surrendered. Not into the pain, but into God. 

I called upon every possible  Angel, Guide, Master and God to come save me. And suddenly I don't know what happened to my aggressor but something came to him and he let me go. 


3. Awakening

The next stage is a stage of healing and awakening. At this stage you want to hold on to who you think you were and you try to maintain the old societal mask and structures in order to belong and fit it.

Because we live in a society where masks talk with other masks and only occasionally you get to see someone's bare soul. Where fake strength is celebrated and vulnerability judged for weakness. When it is in vulnerability that all gifts are shared through us and with us - it is from vulnerability that true strength is expressed - not via protecting yourself from feeling.  In the awakening stage everything falls down.

You try to be that same old person but you are not that person anymore. You can see right through a lot of things, people,  and almost become an outcast and need a new set of friends because "normal" people would just not get you. And what "normal people" consider important, you now know for sure, those things are just not that important...and the things most people consider 'valuable' and would even kill each other for, you now know for sure, they are actually worthless - not worth fighting for or dying for.

It's as if you have moved to cloud 9 and are now a different version of yourself. Many things are happening in your body and psyche that are far beyond any easy comprehension. If you  have watched the series "Heroes" it feels very much like that. Yet, do not fear change. Let it guide you to your Higher Purpose.


4. Assimilation and Letting Go

Stage 4 is about letting go of pretty much everything- from belonging to the actual bad event to anything that has to do with your old life, in order to embrace and accept the new.

You stop trying to hold on so tight, let go and you surrender even more into the unknown.


5. Rebirth

You are born again as a your new self with integration of new insights, knowledge and energy frequencies. You prepare to start again. The courage that required you to survive and heal has to be available for your new life where perhaps to the world you will not be the same person but a more true and authentic version of you.


6. Conclusion

Although I became aware of these 5 stages of transformation through very challenging times in my personal life, I have also used the key messages and lessons of each stage in completely different situations, and they work every time.

I believe that there is a Higher Divine Intelligence at play, and that even when we think we are the Kings & Queens, and that we know it all, there something much bigger than us, and a plan much bigger than us.

The key, is not to fight change, but to surrender and allow change to occur. When you understand, that in life, everything is designed for evolution, you will understand that, everything that happens to you, good or bad, is happening for you. You only get hurt, stagnate and suffer when you resist this Higher Cosmic Order, that is always trying to guide you, to your Higher Purpose. When you resist this guidance, resist the signs, the flow, you get stuck.

So my advice to you, no matter who you are, where you are, what you have gone through or what you may be going through, is to go back to this article, and identify - in which of these stages of personal transformation are you? Then click on an image correspondent to that stage, for it is giving you a quick nugget of advice for that particular stage. Most importantly, know that all events in life are tests of faith. When you are at the bottom of the bottom, you have nothing to lose, but everything to gain. The only thing left to do at the bottom stage, is to surrender into God and turn up your faith. When you alone are not strong enough, allow heavenly help. If you are non-believer, who cares. If your life is at risk - what is more important? Your life or proving that your beliefs are right? Be willing to let go of all, including what you believe to be true, to allow real truth and light in your life.

Let go. Surrender. Trust. Allow.

Much Love & Light on your journey,

Nara Lee



Use the comments section below to share your own thoughts and experiences of Personal Transformation. Has your faith ever been tested? Are you going through a period of transformation or change? I would love to hear your own stories of transformation and faith.